Here are Some Examples Of the Advice You Get, at killthecrap.com (part 2)

Okay, part two, if you've come this far, guess what, you either skimmed through the last page, or, you've actually been reading! You must have what it takes to invest in yourself,YOU ROCK!!! Yes.

I just want to give you a few "heads up" about what this next part is about. First, it's an email conversation, a reader found the code, followed the directions and is currently getting advice from me. I'm going to insert things in red when I'm making comments along the way. It's going to be a long read, but it's PACKED with interesting stuff.

Subject: had an idea
(A lot of authors would have ommited this part, so they don't look like they don't know what they're doing. But I already know I'm a genius, and you already know this, so I'm leaving this part in so you can see that every day I'm actively involved in not only improving YOUR life, but my own as well. WOW, I'm 'practicing what I preach'.)
Hey Tom, listen I got a few frustrated emails recently from some
other people that have also signed up for the free questions deal
through my site. They've all said the same thing, the ideas are
great, the advice sounds like it makes sense, but it's WAY too
confusing. They feel as though I don't convey my ideas clearly enough.

I'm a great thinker, but not such a great TEACHER is what it's
starting to look like.

Now, in the spirit of Killing The Crap, i want to filter the
nonsense out of my own life just as much as anyone else. I wanted to
know what your thoughts on this subject were. Perhaps because I
understand it I'm glancing over things that should be emphasized
more? Talking about too many ideas at the same time?

One thing that's been working EXTREMELY well is "conversation analysis"
people have been sending me IM conversations they have with women
and I've been sending them back notes about how women view what
they're saying and translating the meaning behind what women are
saying back. I think that works because since the conversations are
are so long I can get all the information I need to really give some
advice, where emails are a person remembering what happened, IM
and/or email conversations are you copying and pasting what already
happened.

Do you feel you have a hard time knowing what information you need
to give me in order to get the advice? Perhaps I'll write up a
questionaire of all the things I need to know to make things easier.

Anyway, write me back and let me know what frustrations, if any, you
may be having with this program. For any ideas, or valuable critisisms,
you'll get some free advice questions added to your credit.

On a personal note, did you A: Move on and start dating a few new
girls? B: Try to make that same girl jealous? or C: Start
Reading the Book again. Perhaps a combination of the three?

Just curious to see how things are working out.
Kephra
www.killthecrap.com
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Hey Kephra,

Good to hear from ya. In respond to your questions:

I think what I've tried to do is uncover a couple of keys points
from your writings. For example, what I've taken is that more
important than anything is CONFIDENCE. This comes from a number of
things, but what you need to always do is live your life, not
someone else's. When you do that, you don't have to "think" as
much......it just happens for you. In addition, if you are living
with confidence, then the worst thing that you can do is get stuck
on one person (easier said than done, but the point remains the same).

But, I think that some of the readers are correct in that there are
so many topics that it can be confusing to figure out how to "put it
all together". Maybe what you can do is lay out a few major points
instead of elaborating on many points. Then, once you've gotten the
really important points engraved into your life, then you can go
into greater detail on some of the other topics.

Everything has been progressing, and I'm noticing a lot of
changes.......not everything has fallen into place, but I'm much farther
ahead than I was a month ago. I hadn't talked to Susan since New
Year's, but shot her an email on Thursday just to say hi (basically,
I didn't want to burn the bridge b/c she has friends :)) But, out
of the blue, she called me yesterday evening. I was in the process
of having some other fun, so I didn't call her back. I'll get back
to her eventually.

On a side note, I do have a question for you:

Yesterday, I was out with a good friend, his girlfriend, and one of her
close friends. Me, and the "friend" (her name is Jennifer). We
hung out all day, had some beers, and went out last night. I spent
a solid 2 hours dancing with her.........which she complimented me
as a "great dancer". Now, I'm not the worst dancer in the world, but
certainly not the best. While we were dancing, I was also dancing
with another girl who was totally into it. I was pretty aggressive
with girl B not because I was trying to apply "jealousy", but I was
just having fun. I looked over and Jennifer was eyeball fucking me
completely! I kept the eye contact with her, left girl B, and
continued to dance with Jennifer. We go to another bar, where
everyone else leaves. So, me and her. We walk to my car and drive
back to my buddies' girlfriends place. I tell her after a few
minutes of talking at 3 in the morning that I "need to go home".
She responds with, "you don't need to go anywhere". So, I fucking
kiss her for a few minutes. Eventually, she looks away and says, "I
can't do this". Earlier in the day, I did learn that she has a
boyfriend (I'm good at finding these types :)). So, I'm positive
that's why she said this. I didn't bother to get a phone number
because I can get in touch with her pretty easily. She's in the
area and likes to hang out, so no problems there.

Kinda odd that she told me not to go home, and then had a little
guilt trip on me. What's going on here?

Hope to hear from you soon,

Tom

Also, what is your IM? I can give you a little more feedback on your
questions if we talk online. Mine is "(removed for his safety)"

___________________________________________

______________________________________________________________
Subject
Re: had an idea - question #3

Okay, 1st, that's EXACTLY what the book is about. And you have no idea how
good it feels to know that even though things are tough, and you're not an
overnight PIMP DADDY, you GET IT. And that's what matters, everything else
follows that. Rock on man. The book in no way makes you into something, the
book doesn't train you to be me, and doesn't sell you retarded one liners
and stupid crap like that. It's a guidebook to finding your true self, and
a lesson plan to teach you how that true self is attractive. BADASS!

And I think I'm going to write a 3rd edition to my book, it's going to be
all the same information, but I'm going to restructure it so it's more
categorized. You get 3 free questions for your feedback! So you're back to 15
free dating questions, lol.

Now, onto your question. Luckily, this one is simple. I'm going to give you

the short answer first, then if you'd like, you can keep reading for all my
philisophical rants.

If you don't care that she has a boyfriend (contrary to popular belief, most
women have boyfriends, yet most women are NOT commited. I delve into
why in my book so you should.... RIGHT... get the damn book), don't ask
her, and don't find out about her boyfriend. If you do care if she has a
boyfriend, then when you find out she does, don't dance with her for two
hours and then let her take you home. That's it, either you wanted her or
you didn't, and you should have acted accordingly either way.

Now on to the rants:

The key points to understand about what happened to you is that not only do
women send "mixed messages" to men, but men send mixed messages to women...
men and women are extremely similar. In the afternoon you're snooping for
information about whether or not she has a boyfriend, NOT whether or not
she's sexually available.

So from the begining of the day, you were actually
setting the tone for something other then a night of fun. However, you
swept her off her feet. So she really had "no idea" what was going on, until it
was about to happen. That's when she started THINKING (uh oh). Now she's
replaying the day in her head, I wrote an awesome article on my website
that ties in great with "why" she did this. But for now just understand that she
was concerned about her social life being effected by her actions. She was
NOT, I repeat, NOT, fucking with you.

Believe it or not... she was asking for permission.

She brought it up, because your actions were contridictory. On the one
hand, you were worried about a boyfriend, on the other hand, you were totally
into her... so which was the more powerful emotion? The fear of the boyfriend?
Or the attraction to her? She had to find out before she "made a mistake".

Because if it's that you were worried about her boyfriend, then when you
have sex with her, it's saying that she "cheated" on her man. So now she's
a dirty whore.

If, on the other hand, you were totally into her, her boyfriend is
obviously boring the crap out of her. So, when you to meet, and you sweep
her off her feet, she realizes that her boyfriend isn't the man for her, you are, and
now she's simply Killing The Crap in HER dating life by being with you. (that's not
to say that Tom would now have to be her replacement boyfriend. But, by her being
with him, it would have been a sensation of liberation, while the "cheating" would
be a sense of damnation, got it? If not Guess what you should do?
That's right! Get the damn book.)

She had to know where you were at, in order to understand whether or not
you completed her equation (wow, real life applications of text from the
book... shocking) Had you not hesitated, she would have slotted you in the "totally
into her" category and you would have banged her ALLLLLLLL night long.

Now, here are some examples of what might have worked to turn that night in
your favor:

Option A: After she said "i can't do this" you pin her up against a wall
and start necking with her... but agree with her. Agree with her as she puts
her hands on your chest and pushes you away. Agree with her as you kiss your
way down her outstretched arms and LITERALLY rip her clothes apart. Agree with
her as you bring her to the ground, and when she resists for the last
time "we can't" you pause, look in her eyes, look "through her" and simply
say "yes we can". Make love to her right on the floor. What this says to her:
It was a night of passion, of uncontrolled lust (which it was, no lieing, no
manipulation needed) it was a moment of extacy where for once in her life,
she didn't hold back, she threw caution to the wind, and did what SHE wanted to do.
In other words... not only did you get laid by doing this, but you empowered her.
WOW. Do you think she would have regretted that? (hell no!)

Or Option B: Actually ya know what? Fuck it, that's what you should have done. lol.

(SIDE NOTE:
When a woman says no, even if it means yes, you're safer assuming it means no.
Even a rape charge that's dismissed will ruin your life. But usually women don't
say no unless they mean it. When a woman says " I Can't" that's completely
different. When a woman says "no" simply back off and try to turn her on to the
point she starts saying something other then no. But if she says no with authority,
just take it as a learning lesson, go home, open up your copy of Kill The Crap In
Dating: For Men, and replay the night in your head and see what went wrong. If
you get stuck, just follow the instructions for the code to get dating advice
questions and I'll tell you what went wrong.)

So what does this mean? You're improving, and that's awesome, but we are
starting to see some key things about ourself now too. How clearly do you
understand your OWN wants, your OWN desires?

If you wanted her, then you wanted her, that's it. If you didn't, then you
didn't. There is no in between. And that night should have either never
happened, or ended up as I described above... so why didn't it? Hesitation.

And where does hesitation come from? Confusion... what are you confused
about? What you want.

Did you actually like her? Or did you get turned off by how flirty she is
even though she has a boyfriend? If that did turn you off... why keep
going? Did you feel obligated to fuck her because you bought a book
that teaches you how to do just that? Hmmmm... interesting.
Maybe, maybe not. That's not the point, the point is that a better
understanding of what you truly want, what you're truly looking for,
will Kill the Crap In Your Dating Life.

But... let's take a moment to really understand what that means. What YOU
want. I want you to take a second to step back, look over that entire day,
and ask yourself, what was your first desire? Your first "instinct" when it
came to her? If it was; "take her to her home and make love to her",
then... and I want you to listen to me carefully now...

then that's fine.

Bro, it's okay to be a man. Say that out loud "It's okay for me to be a
man." There's nothing wrong with wanting sex, if that's what you really
want. Say that "there's nothing wrong with wanting sex". Say it out loud.
Why? Because society has had you and 6 billion other people ASHAMED for
their own natural wants and desires. You don't deserve to sit back and
watch what YOU want, what you've EARNED pass you by simply because
of social bullshit. What the fuck has society ever done for you?
Fuck society. What do YOU WANT? Get that. Period.

In this instance, you wanted her... then you stopped. So either you didn't
want her, but felt obligated to persue her. Or you hesitated because you
weren't sure if banging her was "okay". It is always okay to do what comes
naturally.

Wars keep the population down so we don't suffocate ourself. Sex keeps
society flourishing. Abuse keeps us from taking the good for granted. Lies
teach us to truly understand the people we are speaking with.

Everything that we do is for a purpose. There is no good or bad, there is
no morality to real life. There IS what you want, what you feel, and what's
natural for YOU. There's those that do, and those that don't. Yin and
Yang, whatever the fuck you gotta tell yourself to grasp what I'm saying,
you can't decide if what you do is good or bad. You can only do what is
you. If you don't do you, then you're not living you're life, if you're not
living your life, you probably feel dead inside. (no that doesn't mean run
outside with your shotgun and a smile and start killing people... duh)
Some people will hate you for it... but god damn, some people will
LOVE you for it. Since you can't "make" people love you, and since
there's always going to be people that hate you. There is no point to
pleasing others. Just ask yourself, what do I want? There's
women out there that will give that to you and they will think you're
amazing for allowing them to do just that.

So what is "good", what is "evil" really? Good is something that brings you
towards "heaven". So what is heaven? Heaven is a state of mind in my
opinion, it's fine if you're religious, i'm not. Heaven is waking up every
day and feeling comfortable in your own skin. Heaven is rejecting things
that don't fit in your life, and nourishing things that do. Heaven is
having an average state of certainty, feeling alive. To me, this is it, the world
we have in front of us IS heaven OR hell. That's the point. It's up to YOU.

So where does "evil" take you? "Evil" takes you to "hell". What is "hell"?
Hell is a state of mind. It's needing tricks to get what you want, it's
uncertainty, never knowing if you were really good enough in the first
place, it's feeling misplaced, out of place, without value... it's feeling
dead inside.

And regardless of what any religion says, what any asshole in a bullet
proof golf cart thinks, in my opinion, it is YOU that puts YOU in
heaven or hell.

Let go. Allow yourself to enjoy life, allow yourself to live, that's the
meaning of life... to live. Period. No discussion.

So that's what I think man. I think you held back. And I think that you
deserved to enjoy yourself that night COMPLETELY, whatever that should have
been. You just have to learn to believe that, that you deserve to be
in "heaven".

That you deserve more

Kill the Crap,
Kephra

15 more questions to go ;-).

Oh by the way, I'm taking this email and turning it into an article. I'll
change the names and leave out "defining" details that way if one of your
friends reads it it won't let the cat out of the bag or anything, lol. But
this was some really good stuff that people need to hear. Alright I'm outta here.
_________________________________________________________

Kephra,

Rock on!!! I totally hear what you're saying, and that message absolutely
hit the nail right on the head for that situation. Your right, I should
have never had a reason to put myself in that situation. Either fuck her, (I was
kind of hoping he'd have taken more from that message then just that, but
whatever, lol, he's doing good, one thing at a time) or don't. Don't overthink it,
just do what I want. (really I meant "do what comes naturally" sometimes you
have to stop and ask yourself what feels natural. Example: I was sitting with a
girl and I told her to hold my hand, and she said "Are you telling me what to do?"
I'll be honest, I got scared, that question threw me off. But I stopped before
speaking, and asked myself "what is it I naturally want to do right now?" I got
the feeling that really I just wanted to say "yes", because that was the truth.
So that's what I said... "yes". And then we started making out... go figure.")

I'm making progress, and that's just another lesson in the long journey.
Thanks man.

And, I think that message would be great for an article. It sends a
message that you normally don't think about, but is EXTREMELY key. I'm
looking forward to reading it. Take care........

Tom

Okay, so if you're reading this article thinking, DAMN, that guys knows what
what he's talking about, you're absolutely right. And if you would like some
of the most confusing and frightening dating moments in your life clarified
then get the damn book. Read it cover to cover and keep your eyes peeled
for a hidden code. Take that code, follow the instructions and send it out.
I'll contact you back and we'll get started on Killing The Crap In YOUR
Dating Life.

Thanks,
Kephra
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